Let's Create TV

I came across a very interesting public access television show recently. If you aren’t familiar with public access, it allows average folks like myself to create content and broadcast it through cable television. It is perhaps a misnomer to refer to those broadcasting through public access as “average”. Often, they are anything but.
Artist John Kilduff hosts “Let’s Paint TV”, currently broadcasting through the Internet. Some episodes of the show are conventional, recorded sessions of Kilduff showing the viewer his process of oil painting. The show is famous for the live episodes, in which Kilduff paints while running on a treadmill, taking calls from viewers, making food, and blending drinks. He is quite the multi-tasker.
Kilduff, holding a masters of fine arts from UCLA in California, aims to encourage people of all skill levels to paint or become involved in another form of creative self-expression. Some have speculated that the show is an ironic piece of performance art but Kilduff is sincere about his mission. Though many call in to the show to express prejudice, curse, insult Kilduff, or make derogatory comments about rival gangs, Kilduff continues to take calls, paint, and run.
I emphasize the importance of creativity quite a bit as it’s become my passion. I think that everyone needs to find out where he or she fits in the work of God. Rom. 12:6-8 and several other passages emphasize our varied gifts. Creativity can be a weapon used to battle depression and other forms of adversity. Plenty of people who can’t talk, walk, or see lead fulfilling lives. If a particular path you’ve chosen isn’t working for you or some outside force is working against you, it often takes creativity to find your way to God.

Consider the Flintstones

I remember using the Internet in its earliest stages. I would walk several blocks while waiting for a single picture to download. When I sent e-mail, a bird flew out of the back of my computer and made a sarcastic comment about catching a flight to Cleveland. Oh wait, that was an episode of the Flintstones. You know, there is a number of individuals out there in today's world that simply would not tolerate "back talk" delivered by a kitchen appliance. If my baby elephant vacuum cleaner even considered saying something like "It’s a dirty job, but someone has to do it," I'd have it returned to Marshall Flint's or JC Pennystone immediately.
I have a special attachment to the Flintstones in that my grandparents are the modern Stone Age family. My grandfather could not be any more like Fred Flintstone unless he decided to stop wearing shoes and propel his car with his bare feet. My grandparents spend all their time with my aunt and uncle who bear striking similarities to Barney and Betty Rubble. It's downright frightening. We won't let my grandfather go bowling for fear he will land the ball on top of his noggin or get his finger glued in its holes. I wonder if my grandfather has intimate conversations with a little green Martian that only he can see? It would explain quite a bit about him, really.
Matthew 6:25-30 was the passage written in a book given to me by a good friend and mentor. He wrote it knowing how I struggle with the worries of life on Earth. When life is not convenient for me, I get frustrated. I can barely remember how I lived without computers, a cell phone, and a digital audio player. There are always new worries. Life is not easy no matter how many solutions and fixes we find for it. However, God is always good and will always provide what we need if we depend on him.

Artificial Christianity

I spend quite a bit of my time attempting to invent modern conveniences to simplify every day life. Wouldn't it be sweet to have a clone or at least a highly sophisticated robot Doppelganger to replace you in some of your more mundane, daily duties? I would merely like him to cover for me at the office a few times each week. Sometimes I listen to myself speaking and I don't sound all that different from the artificial intelligence featured in U-Scans at local grocery stores, ATM machines, or Haley Joel Osment (look up that last reference). It's sad really. It's about as sad as the thought I just had that my favorite Meijer cashiers, "Flock of Seagulls Hair" or "Mullet Master," could one day be replaced by machines. At least California has a governor in office prepared for such a "rise of the machines." You know, I would settle for a robot that could make my bed. Why my parents were always so insistent on such a worthless task I will never know. Perhaps my father knows more than I give him credit for. Perhaps he wants to be presentable when the robot king visits to choose slaves worthy of his glory. Truly my imagination defeats my practicality at times.
Many things that Jesus said support the idea that he requires one’s full attention and support. In a world of quick fixes and short cuts, the Christian life is often expected to be easy. Life brings many hardships regardless of whether one chooses to follow Christ or not. The difference is that a Christian faces these difficulties with armed with the hope of salvation. In Luke 9:57-62, Jesus talks about the costs of following him. One who “looks back” when doing the work of the Lord is not fit to serve him. When a follower of Christ looks ahead, he or she is able to see joy in the future. God and his church support us in all we do. We don’t need robots or artificial intelligence to be the followers God wants us to be.

When DEET Doesn't Cut It

I am going to file this week’s news under “WHAT!?” Some respectable scientists in jolly old England discovered that “mosquitoes can develop an immunity to DEET and breed offspring that are also impervious to the bug repellant”. (thestar.com) Female mosquitoes (the annoying ones) use their antennae to find humans. Humans contain the blood needed to fertilize mosquito eggs. DEET, developed in 1958, isn’t completely understood but is believed to interfere with a mosquito’s ability to smell us blood filled humans.
Scientists (perhaps evil scientists), found that some of their studied mosquitoes weren’t reacting to DEET. When the researchers bred these non-reactive “skeeters”, their offspring showed resistance to DEET as well. I suppose this breeding of super mosquitoes isn’t all bad. Supposedly, this research can help us develop alternate mosquito repellants. In the meantime, make sure you are using repellant this summer. Mosquitoes carry some awful diseases.
Satan, like a blood-sucking mosquito, can develop immunity to some of our safeguards. You might not be addicted to pornography or often found gossiping, but we all have our exploitable weaknesses. James 4 discusses full submission to God. We have to examine our motives and allegiances. If we are devoted more to this world than to God, we become his enemy. It is only when we are dedicated completely to God that we can “resist the devil” (James 4:7). Our ultimate goal is purity and there is no finality in our search to obtain it.

Innovation in Times of Adversity

An article I read this morning on dailymail.co.uk sparked my interest for two reasons: 1. I love my iPhone and technology in general and 2. I enjoy reading stories in which innovation triumphs over adversity. The “Mail Online” article I read tells the tale of Martin Brooks, a man whose daughter was born with cerebral palsy. For years, Brooks and his wife “have struggled to understand Mia’s needs by getting her to look at objects or picture cards.”
After buying an iPhone last year, Brooks decided to put Apple’s slogan, “there’s an app for that”, to the test. When Brooks found nothing that fit his 5-year-old’s needs particularly well, he designed his own app. iComm allows Mia (who can’t walk, talk, or control her movements) to point out pictures of food, toys, activities, etc. on the iPhone screen using her eyes. Users can upload photos and voice recordings in order to personalize the app. Mia responds well to pictures of herself doing an activity as well as pictures of friends and family. Brooks said, “It has given her a voice for the first time and allowed us to understand her so much better.” iComm has been downloaded by more than 1,300 people since first made available for the iPhone.
It’s no secret that God loves seeing creativity blossom in the midst of difficult circumstances. When David faces Goliath in 1 Sam. 17, he doesn’t use brute force to take down the giant. He uses a sling and a stone. When Jonah needed some time for reflection, God used a big fish. Jesus is the best example of God’s innovative problem solving. Mankind was sinful and needed to know God. We needed a savior who walked and talked just like us. Plenty of people call God’s creative work “impossible” but “with God all things are possible” (Matt. 19:26). If you keep yourself faithful and open, God can show his innovative plans to you.

Living Water

“The Green Cheapskate” is the blog of Jeff Yeager. It is featured on the web site “The Daily Green”. Without sounding like too much of a “nutty environmentalist”, I want to share a few things Jeff learned while being without running water for 15 days while having a new well drilled on his property. While there are those that seem to consider separation of environmental matters and church to be as necessary as the separation of church of state, I think it’s good to survey the way one interacts with God’s creation every now and then.
The first thing Yeager realized in his 15 days without running water is that toilets are an engineering marvel. A toilet can be manually filled and flushed without running water. Yeager also realized that “clothes don’t really need to be washed so often”. I actually learned this in college. Those were much smellier times. Yeager states that “remodeling an outdated bathroom doesn’t look like a financial priority post-drought”. When one is without running water, functionality becomes more important than form. The next little tidbit in Yeager’s article made me cringe. If one were to drink only bottled water, it would take $1,000 per year to get the recommended amount of H2O as opposed to 49 cents from the tap. The final thing that Yeager learned in his 15 days without running water is that one should never see one’s self in a mirror while taking a sponge bath.
In John 4, Jesus talks to a Samaritan woman while she is drawing water from a well. Jesus tells the woman about “living water” that keeps one from getting thirsty. I think I learned the most about how much I need Jesus when I lived without him. I don’t recommend this lifestyle as I learned that living without “living water” is more than inconvenient. Without Jesus, we will always be found wanting. Without Jesus, we walk in darkness looking for something we’ll never find. Don’t wait until you’re dehydrated to form a strong bond with Jesus Christ.

John’s Double Bacon Deep Fried Cheesecake Burger Supreme

I was recently turned on to a series of articles on topcultured.com entitled “Will They Build It?” In each installment of this series, the fine folks at Topcultured invent a dish that theoretically would be served at a fast food restaurant. Then, the authors attempt to persuade the employees of these establishments to actually create the dish.
The “Double Bacon Rodeo State Fair Cheeseburger” was featured on “Late Night With Conan O’Brien”. At just over 1,500 calories, this Burger King dish consists of a combination of 2 Rodeo Cheeseburgers and 9 Funnel Cake Sticks. For the layman, you start with a sesame seed bun, onion rings, Funnel Cake Sticks, bacon, barbeque sauce, cheese, and a beef patty. Then, you repeat said ingredients. Voila! Only 85g of fat!
The inspirational KFC Double Down has caused quite a stir among the media. This actual menu item at Kentucky Fried Chicken is concocted with two fried (or grilled) chicken breasts. Inside these two poultry buns one can find bacon and cheese. Yum! Topcultured took this monstrosity one step further to compose the “Elvis Fried Chicken Double Down”. Added to the original Double Down is two slices of toasted bread, sliced bananas, and peanut butter. It sounds fairly gross but evidently is great in execution!
God knows that we have need for food. God ordered the ravens to feed Elijah (1 Kings 17:4) and Jesus fed the 5,000 (Matthew 14:13-21). God feeds all living things (Psalm 145:15-16). We have deeper needs than food (Luke 12:23). God didn’t pamper Elijah or his people during the Exodus. Ultimately, our security must be found in making God our greatest desire. I’ve often pondered why things like the Double Down aren’t all that good for us. Consider the grip gluttony has on now. Imagine our response to healthy fried chicken. “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness” (Matthew 6:33).

The Mother of Invention

I found a list of inventions on the internet this morning that no sensible individual should ever consider purchasing or needing. Advancing as far as we have has been no small feat. We have been to the moon and created microprocessors that can perform a variety of incredible feats. Once in a great while though, the right combination of twisted genius, ignorance, and perhaps alcohol intake allows a person to invent items like the baby toupee. This is exactly what it sounds like, embarrassing wigs for infants.
The next invention is one I’ve actually seen at a number of stores. “Doggles” are goggles for dogs. I don’t know about your dog, but there is no way my dogs would be comfortable with a pair of goggles strapped over their faces.
I’ll admit that I’ve written things I need to remember down on my hand. I was caught doing it once to cheat on a test in elementary school and never did it again. The To-Do Tattoo allows one to write down a to-do list and create a temporary tattoo. I guess it would make a pretty nice gag gift for one of those “over the hill” type birthday celebrations. If you are getting senile, you might need the next invention. The “Motorized Ice Cream Cone” spins the ice cream in your mouth so you don’t have to. I can think of a couple individuals I might like to give this gift too as they really seem to be working hard when eating ice cream. This is a little pet peeve of mine I’ve recently discovered.
God has blessed us all with an amazing cornucopia of different ideas and abilities. Ephesians 4:11-13 mentions some of the different positions in the church as they pertain to building up the church. You might not be a preacher, deacon, or elder, but you can definitely come up with ways to further God’s kingdom on Earth. Galatians 6 tells us about doing good to all and carrying our own load. Use what you have to give others what they don’t have. People might not need baby toupees or Doggles, but they need God.

Nazi UFOs

In the realms of science fiction, conspiracy theories, and comic books, there are several stories and claims regarding Nazi UFOs. Supposedly, prior to and during World War II, Nazi Germany successfully developed advanced aircraft or spacecraft. Some theorists even claim that these craft have survived in secret underground bases throughout Antarctica, South American, and the United States.
The accounts of Nazi UFOs “appear as early as 1950, likely inspired by historical German development of specialized engines such as Viktor Schauberger’s “Repulsine” around the time of WWII.” (Wikipedia.org) An Italian newspaper article from early 1950 by Professor Guiseppe Belluzzo claimed “types of flying discs were designed and studied in Germany and Italy as early as 1942.”
In 1978, a Nazi sympathizer and author named Miguel Serrano claimed that Hitler was a god and was going to lead a fleet of UFO’s from Antarctica in order to establish a Fourth Reich. An upcoming film titled “Iron Sky” is based on this assumption. The film is set in 2018 when the Nazis return with a fleet of UFOs in order to conquer the Earth.
I wouldn’t be completely surprised if Adolf Hitler was actually planning to put Nazis in to space. Human beings love to make plans. The more deranged among us make the most ridiculous plans. Proverbs 19:21 reads, “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 16:1 (NLT) reads, “We can make our own plans, but the Lord gives the right answer.” While it’s good to be ambitious, careful, and responsible, God has the final say. We may have delusions of grandeur or desires to simply have it our way. God wants us to prosper (Jer. 29:11) but his plans might be different from our own.

30 Minutes or Less

Have you ever considered the level of commitment you have towards your family, job, or to God? Once in a while, for whatever reason (probably lack of sleep), I think about what percentage of my total available effort I am giving to my various responsibilities. Do I do the dishes often enough? Do I plan enough activities for the youth group? Do I dedicate enough of my time to serving God?
This morning, I read a story on foxnews.com about a 19-year-old pizza deliveryman from New York City. Assami Semde, a student at Burkina Faso, has only been in the U.S. for six months. He works for Famous Famiglia 125 pizza in East Harlem. Friday evening, Semde came across two men in a hallway on his way to deliver a pizza to an apartment. The men started to harass Semde, asking for a slice of pizza. When Semde refused, one of the men pulled a gun on him. Semde, 6-foot-4, lunged at the man as he bent over to grab a slice of one of the pizzas Semde had dropped to the floor. Building security happened to come by on a routine check and the two men fled. Before going to the police precinct to file a report, Semde delivered the pizzas. They were undamaged and still hot.
If you find yourself in a position like Semde’s, I don’t recommend attacking an armed man to save a couple pizzas. Semde’s boss, a retired NYPD officer, told his employee to leave the pizza next time and get away safely. I have to commend Semde’s commitment to his job. We are told in scripture to “lay aside the old man” (Eph. 4:22) and “put on the new man.” (Matt. 16:24) We are to follow God without any attachment to who we were before we became committed followers of Christ. We become “living sacrifices.” (Rom. 12) Consider the level of commitment of the persons listed in Hebrews 11. We should model this level of dedication on our lives, willing to make sacrifices for our God.

The Name Above All Names

First impressions can be very important in a variety of situations. When arriving for a job interview or when meeting your significant other’s parents, it is best not to smell like unwashed gym socks or expired gorgonzola. If invited to meet the president of the United States, I wouldn’t suggest donning a suit of fur and acting like a cat. Well, unless you are a cast member of the show “Cats” and the president’s staff suggests that you stay in character in order to fit the president’s request. Finally, if you are looking to meet that special someone, make sure your name isn’t George or Ann. Wait… What?
According to a study by Professor Richard Wiseman of Hertfordshire University, “we might subconsciously associate names with those of the rich and famous.” (dailymail.co.uk) People with traditional names that can be associated with powerful individuals like royalty are viewed as successful and intelligent. The way a name sounds also seems to have an effect on one’s perception as female names that are “soft-sounding and end with the ‘ee’ sound” are thought to be attractive. For Wiseman’s study, 7,000 volunteers were given a list of 20 male and 20 female names. They were asked to identify who they thought would be most successful, attractive, and lucky. Fittingly, I am at the bottom of the lucky ranking and near the bottom of the attractiveness standings.
The names of God in scripture have more significance than association with fame or the way they sound. Elohim (Isa. 54:5) means “strong one.” Yahweh (Ge.4:3), or YHWH, comes from a verb which means “to exist, be.” Through this name God expresses himself to be self-existent. Adonai (Gen. 18:2), like Elohim, is a plural of majesty. The singular form means “master, owner.” The Greek word Theos is translated “God” and teaches that God is the only true God. (Matt. 23:9) God’s character is multifaceted. He is more than a supreme being. He is our Lord, father, and everything else we need.

Illuminate 2010: Drive

This weekend the youth group made its annual trip to Illuminate, a youth conference at the Rochester Church of Christ in Rochester Hills, Michigan. I am very thankful to everyone that made the trip. I would also like to thank the elders for allowing us to be there. It was an excellent time of fellowship, worship, and spiritual growth.
The theme of this year’s Illuminate was “Drive”. Various speakers and performers throughout the weekend used the word in its various definitions. David Skidmore, a youth minister from Tennessee, spoke about how many of us are running on empty, living without a passionate relationship with God. He mentioned David’s Psalms of lament that might seem depressing but show an authentic connection to the Creator. While introducing the concept of “Japanese Bible Theatre” to us, David Skidmore referenced Jesus’ meeting with Nathanael and Philip in John 1. In this story we find two kinds of disciples. There are those like Philip that immediately does what God commands without hesitation. Then, there is Nathanael, who though skeptical is complimented for his authenticity and desired as a disciple in God’s kingdom.
Finally, Skidmore spoke about “Our song”. Those of us that know God and are driven by our desire to serve Him have a beautiful song that people want to hear. We need to be aware of what our song sounds like. If we are tied down by Earthly pursuits, our skepticism, or if we can’t get past our lamenting, we have a song that few want to hear. We have to be driven people, and not simply people that believe in Jesus. We exist to love and to serve the people in our lives. Like David Skidmore did, I want to challenge you to find one person in your life that you can lead to know Christ. Pray without ceasing and share the gospel without fear to all who will hear.

Gotta Catch 'Em All

This week I will be making, by far, my most “nerdy” illustration. Buckle up. It’s going to be a bumpy ride. A big phenomenon among today’s youth (and youthful gray haired folks like myself) are various games based on obtaining a collection of cards, toys, or electronic monsters. Some of the more popular games in this category are Yu-Gi-Oh!, HeroClix, Magic: The Gathering, and Pokemon. An insurmountable sum of time and money is spent purchasing, trading, and competing in these games. Tournaments and other events based on them are held throughout the world.
The one game in this collectable category that’s always gripped my brother and I is referred to as “Pokemon”. In the Pokemon video games, the player catches and battles with various creatures on his or her way to become the best “Pokemon trainer” in the game’s world. The games use an ingenious paper/rock/scissors system. For example, a Pokemon creature that uses fire can be bested in competition by a creature that spews water. In order to win battles against one’s opponent either in the game or in person, one must have a team of creatures that is diverse and skilled in the various elements.
Kids have been enthusiastic about collecting for centuries. When it comes to various virtues and attitudes detailed in scripture, kids (and adults) can be a little less zealous. There are various lists in scripture including the definition of love in 1 Cor. 13, the components of the “full armor of God” in Eph. 6, and the qualities of a Christian in 2 Peter 1. You can see that God (and the Bible’s writers) is very thorough. He wants us to have the “collect them all” mentality. There is always some facet of ourselves that we need to be working on. If we exclude parts of God’s commands, we are left vulnerable and unbalanced. Only through self-examination and training can we resist Satan.

And the Award Goes to...

I have the Academy Awards to thank for my recent movie watching mood. Always a fan of the cinema and a part-time movie buff, it doesn’t take much to send me in to a film frenzy. This time of year, I spend the later part of my evenings catching up on any award nominated movies and performances I might have missed.
I was rather excited to see “The Hurt Locker” receive the Oscar for Best Picture. It’s not that I didn’t enjoy “Avatar” or the other nominees. I just like to see lower budget, more human/character centered movies take home the biggest honor in the motion picture industry. “The Hurt Locker” had a budget of $11 million and is the lowest grossing best picture winner of all time. “Avatar,” on the other hand, cost more than $230 million to make and broke box office records.
“The Hurt Locker” follows a United States Army Explosive Ordnance Disposal team during the Iraq War. The script was written by a freelance writer embedded as a journalist in 2004 with a US bomb squad in Iraq. Their job is among the most dangerous and most important in the military. They deserved to be recognized.
The Bible is centered on the lives of human beings with dangerous jobs. It could be nothing more than a simple instruction manual with step-by-step instructions. However, it follows people like Moses, who faced an angry Pharaoh. It tells the story of Job, who remained true to his faith despite losing everything else. It reveals the life of David, who (like “The Hurt Locker”) stood in the face of tremendous odds and conquered a giant. In the New Testament, we read about Jesus and his apostles, who suffered much to forever change the world. Carefully study the lives of these heroes. You will see that “average” human beings can become “more than conquerors.” (Rom. 8:37)

A Few Words About Nonverbal Communication

I am a big proponent of nonverbal communication. I don’t prefer it to verbal communication, seeing as how I’ve spent quite a few years attempting to speak correctly. However, I can’t claim to have mastered the English language and I certainly can’t tell you that I’ve come close to becoming a skilled nonverbal communicator.
Facial expression, gestures, signs, and use of space are all important components of nonverbal communication. An About.com article states, “Multicultural differences in body language, facial expression, use of space, and especially, gestures, are enormous and enormously open to misinterpretation.” A study at UCLA revealed that up to 93% of communication effectiveness is determined by nonverbal cues. Another study showed that the impact of one’s performance is determined 7% by words used, 38% by voice quality, and 55% by nonverbal communication. Having a very high and occasionally shrill voice myself, I depend highly on nonverbal communication.
In order to understand nonverbal communication, one must practice watching “facial expressions, eye contact, posture, hand and feet movements, body movement and placement, and appearance and passage as [someone walks] toward you.” If you have to choose between reading one’s words and one’s nonverbal cues, it is usually the right choice to go with the nonverbal communication. These cues reveal more than words.
In 1 John 3:18, it is stated that we should “not love with words or with tongue, but in deed an truth.” Anyone can talk about their love for their fellow man or for the Lord, but how many of us take time to show our love? James 2:15-17 tells us that faith without works is dead. More than a gesture or facial expression, acts of service can bond people together and change the world in significant ways. Encouraging words are great, but always look for other ways to serve your fellow man!

Winterfest 2010: "The Veil"

The youth group had an excellent trip to Gatlinburg, TN for Winterfest this year. We would like to thank everyone who made the trip possible including (but not limited to) the parents, teens, sponsors, elders, and everyone who donated funds through the collection plate and our various fundraising events. As always, this trip allowed us to have fun, bond together, worship, and learn more about our God. Everyone who attends comes back spiritually invigorated and more enthusiastic about serving the Lord.
This year’s theme for Winterfest was “The Veil”. The theme was addressed from several angles. We discussed “the veils” in our lives. All of us have things in our lives that keep us separated from God and blind to the truth. We make idols out of a variety of pursuits including money, beauty, health, sex, and popularity. We make ourselves comfortable with the temporary and avoid the eternal God. Daniel and his associates were used as examples of individuals who put God first even when facing threats of death.
Our world was compared to the city of Babylon and it’s lust for power, wealth, and physical pleasures. The speakers told the story of Belshazzar and his lack of respect for God. He was given a prophecy of his destruction and we will end up destroyed as well if we try to gain life outside of God. One lesson was about the veil on the temple and how Christ’s sacrifice gives us access to God.
There was an excellent presentation on apologetics. Through a mock debate between a believer and a naturalist/agnostic, we were shown how to defend our faith without being condescending or offensively aggressive. Finally, we heard the story of Sean Algaier, a youth minister and “Biggest Loser” contestant who has lost nearly 200 lbs. He spoke about confronting our personal demons and achieving excellence with God’s help.

The Life of a Christian is Curling

According to the bastion of information known as Wikipedia, “curling is a team sport with similarities to lawn bowling and shuffleboard played on a sheet of carefully prepared ice.” Two teams with four players on each team take turns sliding heavy (about 42 lbs.), polished granite stones down the ice towards a circular target marked on the ice (called the “house”). As the stone makes it way across the 140 to 150 feet ice surface, two sweepers brush the ice to control the speed and trajectory of the stones. The purpose of the game is to complete a delivery of 16 stones (an “end”) with the winning team’s stones closer to the center of the house than the opposing team’s stones. There are 10 ends in a complete match.
A curling team is named according to when a team member throws a stone. The lead is the first, the second is appropriately titled as the “second”, the vice is the third, and the skip is the last to throw a stone. There are three basic shots: a draw puts the stone in the house, a guard protects a stone or creates an obstacle, and a takeout knocks out an opponent’s stone. The sport of curling is featured as part of the Winter Olympics.
Studying Matthew 7, there are a few teachings of Jesus that can be connected to curling. For one, curling requires a precise draw throw towards the house. In order for us to have life, we must walk on the narrow road. There are others (sweepers if you will) that can assist us in staying on this road. We have to watch out for false prophets who try to lead us away from God. They are like the takeout throws. Finally, and I think this is a perfect illustration; the wise man builds his house on the rock. Though stones might try to take us out of the house, a guard, the rock of our salvation, defends us.

Babies Are Evil

I read on article on the Internet this morning that reveals some of the more “evil” actions observed in babies. This isn’t just another ploy of mine to avoid having children as I still plan for my wife and I to do that in the near future. I just want to make you, the reader, aware of what human beings are capable of when living purely by instinct.
Scientists have observed that before reaching 6 months of life, babies will fake laugh and cry to get attention. They pause during crying to see if anyone is paying attention. Babies also know how to create a distraction if they’ve done something wrong. UK researchers conducted a study in 2004 that revealed babies show prejudice. Almost 100% of the babies in the study spent more time looking at photos of people deemed to be “attractive” than “unattractive”. Babies also tend to focus longer on photos of people of the same skin color. The theory is that babies are attached to the people of their own tribe. Babies also exhibit defiance in the form of tantrums and constant use of the word “No” in order to define themselves and exhibit control over their environments. Finally, (this might really shock you) babies bang their heads to get the rush of adrenaline from the pain and the comforted exhaustion afterwards.
As we study the life and teachings of Christ in our teen class, I have been brought back to “The Jungle Book” on several occasions. If we don’t spend our lives learning and growing spiritually as we grow physically, we are nothing more than instinct driven animals. 1 Cor. 3:2 and Hebrews 5:12 contrast “milk” and “solid food”. We should be progressing from milk to solid food but constantly obstruct our own growth. The best way to achieve maturity is together. We have to build each other up and equip each other to do God’s work. (Eph. 4:12-13)

Manage Up

This week fun bit o’ information comes to us courtesy of Lynn Taylor, author of the book “Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant: How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job”. Let it be known for the record that I love my boss (God), I don’t think anyone in the office is childish, and I haven’t even read Lynn Taylor’s book. (I don’t read nearly as much as I would like to)
According to a survey issued by Taylor, employees spend 19.2 hours a week worrying about what their bosses say so or do. 13 of these hours come during the workweek and 6.2 of them come during the weekend. Taylor states, especially in this economic climate, that employees “have to set limits as you would with a child.” Her approach comes in form of a handy acronym: “C.A.L.M.”.
First, you must “Communicate with your boss bravely, openly, honestly, and frequently.” You must Anticipate – “be aware of problems before they escalate and have solutions ready”. One must also Laugh to relieve tension and create “a better atmosphere”. Finally, an employee should “Manage up by using negative and positive enforcement for certain behaviors.”
Reading the article about Lynn Taylor on walletpop.com, several principles from scripture came to mind. The one regulation that one might believe stands in opposition to scripture is “Manage up”. While we can’t manage God, we can certainly manage our view of Him and how we interact with Him. God isn’t constantly waiting for us to make mistakes so that he can issue punishment. (Jer. 29:11) God is not looking for blind, fearful devotion. When Jacob wrestled with an angel in Gen. 32, he was rewarded. We should constantly be wrestling with our concept of God, re-examining why and how we dedicate our lives to Him.

A Hostage's Survival Guide

This week I’d like to share with you a few tips for surviving a hostage situation. Let’s hope you’re never in one, but at least you’ll know how to stay alive. These are tense times in our world, with levels of stress, angst, and general political unrest rising constantly. You never know when that next trip to the bank or shopping mall will turn in to an all out hostage crisis. This information comes from the NYPD negotiation team.
First, don’t try to be a hero. Second, do what you are told. Don’t speak unless you are spoken to, and then only when necessary. Get comfortable but always keep an eye on your captor. Don’t make suggestions, as you’ll be blamed if anything goes wrong. Don’t try to escape unless you are absolutely positive you’ll be able to. Even then, you should think twice. Let medical needs be known in a matter of fact way. Be observant, memorizing the captors’ faces, names, etc. Only answer “yes” or “no” if you are the end fielding questions from the authorities. Finally, don’t be argumentative and hit the floor when help comes.
A lot of the comments on this article suggested that if you know you are going to die, you should attack your captors like some of the 9/11 victims did. Other comments suggested that these tips are intelligent and contrast many of Hollywood’s representations of hostage crises. I often consider how Jesus handled his captivity. In Isaiah 53, Jesus is likened to “a lamb to the slaughter”. He could have escaped, but he said nothing. There are times in our lives where we have to take a stand and sacrifice ourselves for others. There are other times when we need to endure until help arrives. In Matt. 4, Jesus endures tremendous temptation until Satan leaves him and angels come to attend him. For now we are help captive in our bodies. If we carry on, we will be saved.

Team God

An interesting debate has arisen among many of my friends and associates. The split seen among my peer group is reflective of a larger split facing the entire population. I do not speak of race, economics, or other common sources of division. I refer to the Conan vs. Leno controversy that has infested my news gathering experience. For those of you who don’t know (kudos to you for having actually important matters occupying your time), Jay Leno’s current 10:00p talk show will be moved to 11:30 after the Olympics and Conan O’Brien is to be moved to 12:00p. However, Conan has stated that he is not willing to inhabit this time slot and might leave NBC if negotiations fail.
One commentary compared this situation to telling your wife that you will be marrying someone new in 5 years whom you’ve become interested in. Your wife decides to get in shape and others start to take notice of her. When 5 years has passed, you try to work out an agreement to keep both relationships.
Needless to say (sorry polygamists!), it is not in one’s best interests to have two wives. God designed marriage to be between one man and one woman. (Matt. 19) God isn’t a fan of divided interests. He values loyalty, commitment, and discipline. Matthew 6:24 tells us, “no one can serve two masters.” You can’t “have your cake and eat it too” so to speak. Sometimes the offerings of the world are mighty tempting. It often seems like the bigger, better deal or the greener grass is offered outside of God. However, us Christians make a covenant with God. A covenant isn’t something you can slip in and out of. Imagine how angry your spouse would be if you told him/her that you want to marry someone else. Now imagine how the all-powerful God feels when you chose to leave Him.

Someone Has a Stinky Kitty!

In case I haven’t mentioned it before, I will remind you that my life is chock full of awkward moments. I don’t know if I have more than my fair share, but these moments come ridiculously often in my daily interactions with other human beings. Let’s just say if I ask someone for a synonym of awkward, he or she replies, “Your life”. This morning’s awkward moment was not nearly embarrassing as many others, but it was uncomfortable nevertheless. The following story, which you’d know if you followed me on Twitter or Facebook, mentions urine. I hope that doesn’t offend you and lead to yet another awkward moment.
I took all three of my pets to the vet this morning. I carried the cat in first, sharing in pet related conversation with other pet owners (awkward conversation, I should add). I went to get my dogs and came back to find the cat had covered herself in urine. She is an extremely clean animal and has never done this before. Her formerly fluffy, now soaked body made its way around the vet’s office covering everything in urine and filling the air with a horrendous scent. I apologized at least 40 times. To make things worse, I was very tired and fell in to a guilt-induced trance. While I was thinking about how remorseful I was, the veterinary assistant asked me if I had any questions. I believe that I stared her straight in the face for at least 10 to 15 seconds before giving an answer.
I don’t think life has to be as awkward and guilt ridden as we sometimes make it. In Romans 8 we learn that because of Jesus, we do not face condemnation. John 8:36 tells us that the Son has made us free. We should live like we are free, excited about who we are and how God can use us to do his work. If we live sincerely by faith, we live with a clean conscience. (Heb. 10) We don’t have to worry about what other people think of us because God thinks well enough of us to set us free from sin and guilt! Hold your head up high and know you’re saved!

We Are All Supermen

Jeff Wise’s book, “Extreme Fear: The Science of Your Mind in Danger”, discusses how our bodies respond to hazardous circumstances. Wise uses several real stories as the framework for his exploration. In a chapter entitled “Superhuman”, an ordinary man performs an incredible feat of strength to rescue a cyclist who has been run over by a car. Tom Boyle, Jr. and his wife were leaving the shopping mall where they had just had dinner. They heard a Camaro squeal its tires as it shot onto the avenue. Tom looked up to see a shower of sparks fly up from beneath the Camaro. The Camaro had hit a cyclist and pinned him beneath the vehicle. Boyle, without thinking, ran towards the Camaro, reached under its frame, and lifted the vehicle off of the 18-year-old cyclist. Boyle held the car’s front end up for about 45 seconds while its driver pulled the cyclist to safety. Boyle, no weakling, was able to lift a 700 lb. barbell. A stock Camaro weighs 3,000 lbs. Something extraordinary happened to the body of Tom Boyle.
One of my personal goals is to view others and myself the way that God sees us. God knows our potential. Too often we sell ourselves short thinking we’ve worked ourselves in to an inescapable corner, unable to accomplish anything great. We think of ourselves and others as too old, too young, too stupid, too weak, or too inexperienced. God always seems to choose the least likely heroes. When the Israelites were led out of Egypt, God didn’t find the best speaker. When Samuel looked for a new king, he wasn’t to select the tallest or strongest man. When Jesus hand picked his apostles, he didn’t ask for a resume or good references. He chose fishermen and tax collectors. Today he chooses you!